'30 Rock' Returns!

Dear '30 Rock',
Thank you for coming back to us. I missed you severely while you were gone. 
As Liz Lemon said, "Happy Two Thousand Twelve!"
Love,
-em
P.S. "Are you touching the phone because you're a baby and you're developing your fine motor skills or...because you're trying to tell me something?"
P.P.S. Read my full review below (with spoilers), after the baby.

'30 Rock' returned to NBC last night after an extended hiatus. The characters on the show were also all coming back to work after being gone for the winter. Over their break Jenna had become a judge on a singing competition for kids (bascially an 'American Idol' for the tot set--the fact that this isn't already a real show is pretty shocking), Kenneth had decided the Rapture was coming, and Liz Lemon had some interesting developments in her own life. But lets not get too far ahead of ourselves.

The episode opened with Liz and Jack interacting for the first time since the holidays, and Jack trying to prove how well he really knew Liz. Almost everything he quoted was accurate, which clearly gave Jack the normal sense of superiority he always craves (come on, why else would he be friends with her?).

Despite the  fact that Jack failed to see it (a hint of things to come, perhaps), everyone else on the staff noticed that Liz was not at all like her usual self. She ignored Tracy's threats to "do something crazy", gave Kenneth the day off because he believed the Rapture was coming, and was way more laid back than normal. Tracy decides to investigate why Liz is acting differently.

Meanwhile, Jack is concerned because Jenna is making children cry on the singing kids TV show. Normally he wouldn't care at all, but his daughter is skewing his perspective (Or maybe making it the right one. Nah, let's go with 'skewing', capitalist Jack is way more fun). He tells Jenna to tone down her mean talk, but when he sees the audience's reaction (they likes mean Jenna!) he changes his mind. This decision is solidified by a scene in which Jack's daughter, Liddy, asks for "money" (actually she says "mommy", but Jack chooses to hear what he wants). Jack is thrilled that his little girl is growing up to be a capitalist, just like him.

Since Kenneth has been given free rein to do whatever he wants, he decides to do his chore list (this is actually what it sounds like). Pete tries to inspire him to do better things before he dies, but he's uninterested. Toofer, Frank, and Lutz mess with Kenneth throughout the episode, encouraging his belief that he's going to die.

During his investigations Tracy sees Liz buying some pills, and becomes concerned that she has become a "crack whore". He brings her bizarre behavior to Jack's attention. Jack looks at one of the pills and realizes that it's for joint pain. He then uses his wealth of Liz Lemon knowledge to figure out what she's been doing...she's dancing. In a middle-aged cheerleading WNBA team.

Jack thinks he has everything figured out at the end of the episode: money is everything, Liddy is a budding Capitalist, and Liz Lemon is so happy because she's dancing. He's wrong. He drops Liz off at a movie theater, declaring that she must be going to the 9:10 show alone, and reiterating that he knows her as well as she knows herself. But, just as his car begins to leave, Jack notices Liz kissing a man. The look on his face is priceless, as though he's suddenly afraid that he's lost something. I think it will be fascinating, and hilarious, to see how Jack will function if Liz Lemon is not a complete mess.

Is it next Thursday yet?