New Girl Play By Play: "Valentine's Day" Recap

'New Girl' Play By Play: "Valentine's Day"


Minute one: Schmidt has already said "holla".

Minute two:  First dates on Valentine's Day are a bad idea. Even Schmidt knows this. Get a clue, Winston.

Minute two: Is one night sex the new one night stand?

Minute three: Did Jess just refer to her vagina as "little Jess"? Huh.

Minute five: "Bombing emotionally" is not good one night stand material.

Minute six: Schmidt and Cece make a great team. They both like the Phantom Tollbooth! Clearly they're soulmates.

Minute eight: Cece's boyfriend is high on magic mushrooms. Time to break up?

Minute eleven: Schmidt doesn't trust the youths in Jess' potential one night stand's sketchy neighborhood. He kinda has a point.

Minute eleven: Does anyone else think Schmidt has been suspiciously insightful this episode?

Minute sixteen: Everyone is fighting. Everyone. (Except not Julia and Nick, cause they have some weird/not so important B-story going on)

Minute nineteen: Schmidt just carried Cece out of the fight over his shoulder.

Minute twenty-two: Making out while someone is eating tacos is pretty tricky.

Minute twenty-three: That random hook-up guy isn't a web creator, and Jess isn't a player. Boy, what a surprise.

Minute twenty-three: Is Nick going to work for Julia's law firm now? Because that is not a good idea. Ever.

Minute twenty-four: Does anyone else think that Jess and Julia are looking more and more like each other with each new episode? Boy has a type.

Minute twenty-five: Now this is getting depressing (re: Winston and potential girlfriend).

Minute twenty-five: Depression resolved (re: Winston and potential girlfriend).

Minute twenty-six: Sometimes I actually want Schmidt and Jess to get together. Weird.

Minute twenty-six: And now she is actually thinking about having sex with him. Is this actually going to happen?

Minute twenty-seven: Oh wait, here's Nick. Ugh, I actually kind of wanted that to happen. Now I feel guilty saying that.

Minute twenty-seven: Oh good, Cece is having sex with Schmidt. The fact that Jess and Cece have similar taste in men is vaguely disturbing. I mean, they both wanted to sleep with him cause he smells good?!

Minute thirty: Jess calls Cece on the phone. She's telling Cece that she almost slept with Schmidt. But Cece is in bed with him. Awkward.

Apparently at some point Jess is going to make out with this guy.